I’m Gettin’ Squirrelly Out Back

You just can’t make this stuff up.

A very popular idiom reminded me of a situation that has gone on with me over the past few weeks.  It is said, “Even a blind squirrel finds a nut (acorn) once in a while,” but I have found nuts and acorns are not the only things they find.

The idiom, of course, implies that no matter how wrong or misguided someone might be, they can still get it right just because they’re lucky.

But, after watching squirrels in my back yard, I can unequivocally say luck has nothing at all to do with it ― blind or not.

For the past few weeks, the squirrels have conspired to get all the fruit off my pear trees. Yes, conspired.

To compound matters, they are doing everything in their power to make a mockery of me; they’ve done a fine job of it.

First, I have rubber snakes in the trees.  Animals like squirrels are supposed to be afraid of snakes, right?  They say, “Go large or go home,” so I moved up to a natural predator ― a life-sized, life-like owl. The squirrels scoffed at both.

If squirrels laugh, they were surely laughing at me.  So much so, one squirrel moved all the way down the tree just above the owl and chiseled off some of the pear ― right in front of me.  After I turned my back, he knocked the owl out of the tree.

Yes, they’re laughing at me. Mocking me.  Begging me to do something to stop them.

But, I sit there and take it.  Somehow, some way, they’ve gotten gotten in my head and found out I quit hunting in my early ’20s.

So, how much do they taunt me?  Well, the coupe de grace happened this morning when they dealt the finishing blow ― perhaps in an act of mercy.

After I woke up, I went out the back door to the deck to sit and enjoy the early morning with my coffee, as I normally do ― that’s when I saw it.  I was furious.

On the corner banister there it sat ― a half-eaten pear complete with little pieces and shavings ― taunting me.  And, in the tree right behind the deck was a squirrel ― he appeared to smirk.

What did I do? I threw up my hands in surrender, making sure the squirrel could see me doing it, as if he understood ― well, maybe he did.

I know most will think all this is funny, but we have all had squirrels at one time or another in our lives.

You know, people that bring on drama, people who do nothing but irritate us, mock us and make our lives a living misery. And, sometimes, we just have to throw our hands in the air and surrender.  Or, we can just ignore them, move on without them and let them find someone else to irritate.

For me, I’ve decided to just turn a blind eye and ignore the squirrels.  Maybe my blind eye will be lucky for me, as the idiom says. Sometimes it’s just better to be lucky.

Maybe once the pears are gone, who knows, maybe they’ll go nuts.

As I type the final keystrokes to this blog, I look out the window and in the tree just outside sits a squirrel chattering, and yes, he has another one of my pears, but it’s up to me to find a way to shine ― and, I will.

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